My yoga teacher Kelly, that I love, read this poem during shavasana. It intrigued me and I asked for a copy. I don't know who wrote it.
Everything I Think I'm Missing
I am struggling. There's who I
believe I ought to be, and who
I really am. It's humbling, isn't
it? This being, this mystery, this
me sits here radiating energy, yet
I'm gripped by a nameless fear
that I'm missing exactly what
I came here to experience.
I am suffering, telling myself
stories of what life should look
like. And then I get the message
like a meteor, like the power
coming back on after hours
in a storm.
This life, this extraordinary
imperfection, this moment
just as it is, this is all I'm
here to receive. The infuriating,
limitless simplicity of day-to-
day living holds everything
I think I'm missing.
These thoughts remind me of Dave. His frustration with his limits in life. He is so dang smart and could do anything and wants to do everything. He feels like life is over for him, he has done all he can do. When I see this picture of him with Lizzie it feels like the end of the poem. His figuring out the answer. He is holding all he thinks he is missing.
What are your thoughts on the poem?
7 comments:
I was thinking about how this poem no longer applies to me...how I've been able to overcome most of my "what life should be" woes and accepted it as a journey (eternal)...but then you threw in that last bit and remembered my poor hubs up in bed, exhausted from his day, feeling much like dave, and that he is slowly learning that his life and choices didn't end 2 years ago, that his present decisions are never permanent, and that he most likely has a good deal of time left on his hands that he better not waste! Those boys :)
I feel like I'm trapped in this poem--I'm holding on tight to mylife as it is right now, afraid of change or a decision that may be made--I Know being a Mom and a Wife you need to take each day as it comes and just treasure it, but sometimes you just feel stuck!
i need more time to process....
this is a deep poem...however, after reading it several times it is simple and makes complete sense. gordon b hinckley once said,"Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he's been robbed. The fact is that most putts don't drop, most beef is tough, most children grow up to be just people, most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual tolerance, most jobs are more often dull than otherwise. Life is like an old-time rail journey...delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas, and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride."
THE REASON
A certain panic
Finds me
When I see
A forest, a train,
A library.
So many trees to touch,
Places,
Faces yet to view,
And, too,
So many words to read.
If I concede
All spece to earth,
All time to life,
The disproportion
Is absurd
(My tiny taste
And the giant waste
Of all creation
I've not known).
What a wretched,
Faithless view
Of God's economy.
It isn't true.
The forest, the train,
The library--
Are why we have Eternity.
--Carol Lynn Pearson
great poem.
great picture.
heart touching.
i love your blog.
i love your love of your family. and your son seems like such a treasure upon reading your last most recent post about him.....
life is truly lovely isn't it?!
tara
I understand on many levels. Layne, like Dave, has struggled with this - but most days I see the quiet strength that comes from understanding that it's not about what we want . . .it's what Heavenly Father wants. Kind of hard for a couple of Type A personalities:)
"The world breaks all of us, and some of us are strong in broken places" Ernest Hemingway
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